Hugging

I cannot put into words how important hugs are for me. The hug is not very intimate in its own right, but it is the most powerful magnifier of an intimate moment. Whilst we like to hug, it is the hug after sharing an intimate arousing moment that I refer to here. There are two types of this hug that are most emotional and memorable for me.

The submissive's hug

In most of our sex life, I concentrate on pleasuring her. I usually go down on her slowly and gradually  and try with all my senses to listen to the little signs of her body. I pride myself in knowing and understanding her reaction to my touches.
Being submissive is about admitting to myself and my partner that I need guidance in many areas and that I am not the best person at judging things so I rely on her taking the control. But there is a little pride that in giving pleasure I need no direction. In our relationship this is a small bit where I seek to perform without guidance. The response of her body fills me with pride and happiness. In some ways going down on a woman is a very mechanical task. You listen and adjust persistently, you alternate between very sensitive touches and movements and other moments where your tongue performas with as much speed and strength as you an possibly gather.
As my partner nears orgasm, this task comes to an end. The eruptions in her body are too big to be reacted to and suddenly the hormones are releasedand he falls from her raised level of arousal and tension into a level of happiness and relief.
This is the moment when I hug the submissives hug. I will wrap my arms around her, hold her tight almost too tight.  My hands may massage her shoulders, often I will hold her head. We may lie there for a few minutes in silence but often I will whisper a few words. "Thank you", "I love you", nothing meaningful.
In my role as a submissive this hug has a number of meanings:

• I want to express that what I have just done is for her and only for her. As a submissive I enjoyed what I have just done but I am not seeking any tit for tat return of the pleasure. As far as she is the dominat, she is the only person I will ever do this for, the only person I know well enough to be able to give good oral to.
• I have no problems with being dominant outside our relationship and the bedroom but here there was a paradox. Many of my laddish friends will hardly go down on their girlfriends, they would consider it as degrading. At the core of my submission, I love going down on her. It is wonderful to express deep dedication to her pleasure, yet to be successful in maximising it I need to act creatively and not follow orders. I feel like an artist in submission and my craft has been done. The work perishes but I want to hold on to it for a little longer. I want to delay the transition.

The submissive hug is usually a few minutes maybe 3 or 5, it will trigger thoughts of submission that will usually be with me for longer until I fall asleep.

The dominant's hug

Whilst the submissive's hug is to some extent a reversal of roles, the dominant's hug is a hug that is started by me, but my partner remains in control throughout. It usually starts as a normal hug with one of us holding the other close. When I hope for sexual release before going to sleep, I sometimes direct her hand towards my penis. I have a relatively low chance of her following through but if she does, she will touch me in ways that are mildly painful but guaranteed to make me stand to attention. It is a most wonderful feeling but I must not express this too strongly. If my breathing gets heavier or my heart beat increases she will usually just stop roll over and leave me unhappy and frustrated.
If however I passed by remaining silent, then there are two possible outcomes. The more freqeunt is the dominant hug. It usually starts by her caressing becoming more finger-nail dominated, with tight pinches on nipples, balls and penis. When this increases, I know that I will not be allowed to orgasm that night. but I am to remain silent. Once she is happy with my endurance, she will hug me tight. I believe it is an expression of pride for me giving up the pleasure for her, I do not enjoy pain. The hug is tight but not too tight. She might tease me with a smile or a laugh, sometimes her leg will press against my penis again the hug often only ends when my member has become limp again.
I often struggle falling asleep after the dominant's hug. My mind is overwhelmed by sub space, yet I am thankful for every moment of it.